I need as many ideas as possible here since I seem to have exhausted them all here. I'm potty training, and the problem isn't bladder control, it's physically getting my three and a half old daughter on the toilet!! She won't sit on a training toilet, a special seat on the toilet, or the toilet itself, in fact she refuses to go in the bathroom these days. When I try to get her to go she says over and over, "I can't do it, it's too hard, it's not working." I have tried any sort of bribery, I have tried taking away all that is most dear and precious to her (candy, cartoons, pacifier), asking her to not pee, just sit on the toilet and count to 5 (or even 2 gor goodness sakes), sending her to bed early... Seriously, my child cannot be coerced to do anything she doesn't want to. No form of bribery, punishment or reward works on her. Any ideas I'm not thinking of?
Ok, you need to make the toilet the best part of the entire house. It needs to be a party! Some of the ideas may be over the top, but you'll get the feel for what I am saying.
First of all, I wouldn't try and convince her - I don't think reason and ration help with a determined 3 year old (if she says it's too hard, she'll stick to it). So, I would just focus on getting her to sit on the toilet.
A potty present is the first idea. Buy her a special potty present - the catch: she can only play with it on the toilet. So, to unwrap it, she has to be sitting (not going) on the potty.
A potty party is another idea. Decorate the bathroom with streamers and balloons. Have your little one help you in the kitchen. Make potty cookies, or potty hot chocolate. Again, she can only eat the treat when sitting on the toilet. But, really talk it up the entire time you are making them. And then I would even say something like, "I want the first potty cookie!" I get to sit on the toilet first. Let her see you sit on the toilet. And make sure you have a running dialog, "This is so fun. I love to sit on the toilet. I feel so grown-up. Babies can't sit on toilet, but I can!" You get the idea. But, it is good for kids to see their parents on the toilet, especially if they have an aversion or fear.
Ok, this is silly, but have you ever thought of plugging the tv into a closer outlet, so that they can watch their favorite show on the potty. A potty show, I guess...I know it is crazy, but sometimes you just need them to happily sit there. I never tried this one, but I heard of it and loved it!
Finally, story time on the potty. I am telling you, that I did a lot of reading to my eldest on the toilet.
It sounds like you just need to make the bathroom the best place for awhile - if she's got the control, the next part will be easy! Good luck!